Jigglypuff's special Pokémon interview

Jigglypuff: Hello and welcome to my super special interview. As you know, I
try to limit the characters being interviewed to Starfox related only, but today, in this edition, we will take a step into the world of Pokémon, so, today I'm going to interview.. uh... let's see... no one in particular, but I am inviting Andross, the Starfox and Wolf team over to my place, in Kanto, on mt. moon. I'm sure you already know it's where wild pokémon live, so I'm sure they will get a kick out of it! Im keeping my fingers crossed.. well If I had fingers.. that there won't be and arguments between the two sides... so I guess I'll be waiting here until they arrive..
----
Andross and Andrew are wandering through a tunnel leading to the top of Mt. Moon

Andrew: Uncle Andross... I’m scared!!
Andross: ........he's acting like I care...
Andrew: This place gives me the creeps... it's dark, and humid, and mean!
Andross: You give me the creeps.. now stop whining, I’m trying to read the directions on  this map Jigglypuff e-mailed me..
Andrew: Let's just go home, I’m hungry..
Andross: Yeah!? Well what the hell do you want me to do about it? Regurgitate something up for you to eat?!
Andrew: :Sigh: Never mind...
Andross looks at Andrew

Andross: You want to do something useful? Hear, hold this…
He hands Andrew a lantern
Andrew: Ok Uncle Andross! I'll do a good job holding this-
Andross: SHUT UP!

His voice echoes through the long tunnel
Zubat: ZUUU!!
Andrew: EEK! Did you hear that!?
Andross: ... NO.
Andrew: I think there is something out there!
Andross: Don't tell me you are hearing things again,  because this is not the time, I believe I've figured out which way to go from here..

As he turns around, a Zubat latches onto his back, and Andrew freaks out

Andross: just head south for a couple of....
Andrew: UNCLE ANDROSS I'LL SAVE YOU!! *Throws the Lanturn at Andross. The
Zubat flies away, and the lantern breaks, and Andross back is on fire*
Andross: AHHHHHH! What the (censored) is wrong with you?! YOU USELESS AMATEUR!
----

Later...

----

Andross gets the fire out, and the two are lost in the darkness
Andross: Wonderful. Just wonderful. My back is burnt and I can't see where we are going..
Andrew: (Behind him) Well, maybe if we had a lantern we could use it to light our way!
Andross kicks Andrew

Andross: YOU’RE THE ONE WHO RANDOMLY ATTACKED ME WITH IT!
Andrew: but there was a bat thing on your back..
Andross: YOU...ARE.. HOPELESS!
Andrew: He never believes anything I say...

Suddenly the Zubats return and bite Andrew

Andrew: AHHHHHHH!
Andross: Good... He deserves it!
Andrew: SAVE ME UNCLE ANDROSS! SAVE ME! I'LL BE TURNED INTO A VAMPIRE!
Andross looks at Andrew, then shakes his head
----
Hours later...

----
Andross: Look ahead Andrew, I see light!
Andrew is bitten up really bad

Andrew: Well then head toward the light....
Andross: No kidding....
----
The two arrive on the top of Mt. Moon, and see a small cottage house not too far away.
Andross: There's Jigglypuff's house!
Andrew: Yeah!!

He runs toward it
Andross: ANDREW! WATCH YOUR STEP! YOU DON'T WANT TO FALL OF THE MOUNTAIN AND CRASH TO A HORRIBLE, PAINFUL DEATH- wait, why would I care?
Andrew: Yipee! I’m going to see the pink thing!

Suddenly, he trips and falls on his face. Andross folds his arms, and looks down at him
Andross: Oh, did little baby Andrew fall? Does the little baby need his Uncle to help him up?
Andrew: :Sniff: QUIT MAKING FUN OF ME!
Andross: If you are going to trip, at least trip on something besides yourself... idiot..
The ground moves
Geodude: GEO!!
Andrew: Huh?
Andross: That's absurd... a rock with arms and eyes..
Geodude: GEO!

It pushes Andrew off him
Andrew: AHHHH! UNCLE ANDROSS!! HELP ME!
Andross stands there and just laughs at him
Geodude: DUDE!

It grabs a handful of rocks from the ground and throws them at Andross using rock throw. Andross gets hit in the face with a barrage of rocks
ARGH!! You irritating mineral!

He Grabs the Geodude and punts it like a football. Not too smart, since the Geodude is a rock type

Andross: AHHH! MY FOOT!!
He clenches his foot and jumps around on one leg in pain. The Geodude goes through the air, and crashes into Jigglypuff's window
Andross: Uh oh..
In the distance, we see Jigglypuff walking towards Andrew and Andross, with anger in her normally blissful eyes
Jigglypuff: HEY! IF IM NICE ENOUGH TO INVITE YOU OVER, THE LEAST YOU CAN DO
IS RESPECT MY PROPERTY! NOW IM GOING TO HAVE TO REPAIR THE DAMAGE DONE-
She looks at Andross' face

Jigglypuff: Oh my gosh, what happened to you?
Andross: What?
Jigglypuff: Your face.. what happened to it?
Andrew: Hahahaha! I’m always asking myself the same thing!!
Andross punches Andrew, knocking him out. Jigglypuff flinches as Andrew hits the rocky surface with an awful thud
Jigglypuff: Ouch...  Never mind... come in...

She opens the door. The rest of the Starwolf Team are inside, in the family room
Wolf: SIR!! YOUR FACE!!
Andross: Speak for yourself, mono-eyed-freak!
Wolf growls softly
Jigglypuff: Your face is bruised and cut up..
Andross: That's because a rock thing attacked us.
Jigglypuff: A geodude?
Andross: I don't know what the damn thing was...

He sits down on a chair
Jigglypuff: Um... ok, well I'll be right back, I'll get some ice for you..
She leaves the room
Leon: So...........
Andross:............

He glares at the team
Pigma: ... so...
Wolf: :grumble:
 Suddenly, Fox, Falco and Peppy walk in
Peppy: :Cough: :Cough: :Wheeze: Oh boy, mountain climbing is not my thing..
Buck: Look's like we have company
Jigglypuff runs back in with an ice pack in one hand, and a tray of tea in the other
Jigglypuff: GET OUT OF MY HOUSE!
Buck: Jeez laweez, what did I do?
Jigglypuff: You know what you did...
Buck: Ok ok.. It's just a bad habit I have..
Jigglypuff: And everyone else here has..
Fox, Slippy, and Peppy glare at Andross and the Star Wolf Team. They do the same back
Jigglypuff: Hey! It said no fights in the invitation, didn't it?
She hands Andross an ice pack
Fox: Hahahahahaha look how ugly he is now!
Peppy &Buck: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
the ice pack melts on Andross’ head, as his temper rises
Andross: Grrrrrr..
Jigglypuff: Stop it! Stop it! Stop it!!

She drops the scalding-hot Tea on Andross' lap

Jigglypuff: Oops!
Andross: AHHHHHHH!

He jumps up and runs around in pain. Leon coughs, trying not to laugh at the emperor..
Wolf: (shaking) Don't... do... it... don't laugh.. at him...
The Starwolf Team join the Starfox team laughing at Andross
Jigglypuff: *ears lower* Aw...
Andross: GOD DAMN IT! YOU'RE FIRED! ALL OF YOU! FIRED!
Andrew crawls in half dead; He was apparently attacked by the Zubats yet again
Andrew: Hi.... J-Ji-Jiggly...

He collapses

Andrew: H--help.. me..
Andross is still running around the room screaming, and steps on Andrew
Andrew: AEEEEEEgah!!!!!!!
Pigma: Hey Jigglypuff, do you have any more tea.. or cupcakes..
Jigglypuff: Of course I do!
Pigma: Can I have some?
Jigglypuff: Oh, how rude of me, I’m sorry, I've gotten off track since Geodude flew into and broke my window.. I'll get some right away!

She dashes off to the kitchen
Fox: This is great!! Andross is making a monkey out of himself!
Wolf: Don't get too cocky, Starfox!

Suddenly the Star Wolf theme song plays
Leon: Andross has ordered us to take you down!
Jigglypuff:(In the kitchen) HEY! WHAT'S THAT MUSIC FROM? IT'S ANNOYING! TURN IT OFF!!
Fox smashes Wolf's CD player which was playing the Star Wolf Theme Song
Wolf: I..... can't.... lose..... my.... CD player!
Andross: (rolls eyes) ............ lord....
Pigma: Peppy! Long time no see!

Peppy: Actually I saw you the other day at Jigglypuff's trial....
Andross sits back down and buries his face into his hands, embarrassed by the Star Wolf Team
Andrew: Un.. Uncle.. Andross...
Andrew, half dead, crawls to the chair Andross is sitting on, he reaches his arm to him and rests it on his uncle's leg, trying to get his attention.
Andross: THE HELL ANDREW!?

He kicks Andrew to the other side of the room, this time, he doesn't move
Wolf: ANDREW!! YOUR LINE!!!!
Andrew:..............................
Wolf: Damnit, don't get smart with me!
Andrew:...............................
Wolf: I’m sick of your attitude!
Andrew:........................
Wolf: That does it! You're going down!

He gets up, and rolls up his sleeves
Leon: Wait a second....

He gets up and walks over to Andrew
Wolf: HE WAS SUPPOSED TO SAY "Andross' enemy is my enemy!"
Andross: (Sarcastically) Oh, I’m so disappointed he didn't say that, it's so
pure, so beautiful... it's music to my ears...

He gags
Leon: Hold it Wolf...

He looks down at Andrew and lightly kicks him. Andrew doesn't move at all. Wolf looks at Leon.
Leon: ..... I think he's dead...
Pigma: ............... HEY JIGGLYPUFF! WHERE'S THOSE CUPCAKES!
Leon: PIGMA! SHHHHHHH! WE DON'T WANT JIGGLYPUFF TO SEE-
Jigglypuff walks in with the cupcakes on a tray, she had a cheerful smile on her face
Jigglypuff: All right! Who wants cupcakes? I made enough for everyone, so-

She see's Andrew's lifeless body

Jigglypuff: OH MY GOD!!

She throws the tray with the cupcakes up in shock, they land on Andross'head

Jigglypuff: ANDREW! WHAT HAPPENED TO ANDREW!! HE'S... HE'S NOT MOVING!
Andross: AHHHH! MY FACE!!!
Pigma: AHHHH!! THE CUPCAKES!
Fox: AHHHHH! I SEE DEAD PEOPLE!
Peppy: Fox, did you take your medication?
Fox: What medication?
Buck: Hey Einstein, Fox really does see dead people, and so do I!
Peppy: Oh yeah.. Andrew... sorry, Fox.
Jigglypuff: How did his happen?! Oh no!!! I have a dead ape lying in on my carpet!  Carpet... CARPET! HE'S BLEEDING ALL OVER IT! NOW I HAVE TWO THINGS TO FIX!
Andross: Isn't that the least of your worries?
Jigglypuff turns around to Andross

Jigglypuff: What are you talking about? Least of MY worries? What about you, YOUR NEPHEW IS DEAD!!!
Andross: ............
The Jeopardory theme song plays
Andross:.......So, what's your point?
Jigglypuff: YOU COLD, HEARTLESS .......
Suddenly, Slippy walks in
Slippy: Don't worry, Slippy's here!
Everyone (but Andrew): AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
Slippy looks down at Andrew
Slippy: Whoa!!! Help Andrew!
Jigglypuff: Slippy, I thought Andrew was your rival..
Slippy: Oh yeah, sure, sure....
Peppy, Fox and Falco look at each other
Fox: Jigglypuff, the answer to your question, who killed Andrew was that son of a..
Suddenly. Scooby Doo and the gang walk in to Jigglypuff's house
Fred: Look's to me we have a mystery to solve!
Scooby: Scoooooooooby Doooooooby Dooo!
Buck: You, know, it doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure this one out, we all saw what happened..
Andross looks up at Falco when he says "rocket Scientist"
Jigglypuff: Scooby Doo and the gang? GET OUT! I HAVE A POLICY:  NO NON-STARFOX CHARACTERS ALLOWED UNLESS IT'S A SPECIAL INTERVIEW!
Shaggy: Like, isn't this a special interview?
Jigglypuff: It's a special POKÉMON interview, NOT Scooby-Doo!
Shaggy: Like, Zoinks! Hey Scoob, let's get back to the mystery van! Like, that Jigglypuff looks mighty angry!
Velma: Jinkies!!!!!
Buck: The hell does that mean?
Fox: Who are these people?
Jigglypuff: Just let them leave...
Scooby Doo and the gang walk out of Jigglypuff's house
Jigglypuff: Now... will someone please tell me what happened?
Fox: ANDROSS KILLED ANDREW!
Buck: HE THREW HIM INTO THE WALL!
Slippy points to Andross

Slippy: YOU'LL BE SORRY PUNK!
Andross: Come now, Jigglypuff, you really believe them?
Jigglypuff glares at Andross
Andross: It was an accident
Jigglypuff looks at Andrew, then back at Andross

Jigglypuff: This was no accident... two things I cannot tolerate, senseless murder and LIARS!
Andross: He pushed me to the limit...
Jigglypuff: I feel sorry for you Andross, and above all, I feel sorry for your nephew, the poor thing had such an awful life, always being picked on, you all should be ashamed of yourselves!
Starfox and Starwolf team frown
Leon: :sigh: I guess I never should of put a bomb in his toilet ...
Wolf: I shouldn't of called him a stupid, worthless, pile of monkey shi..
Andross:  Why would you feel sorry for me?
Jigglypuff: You will now live the rest of your life in guilt and remorse, that you killed your nephew, Andrew.
Andross Starts laughing

Andross: How ridicules!! I will live the rest of my life with one less arse to worry about!
Jigglypuff: Ah yes, welcome to phase one: Denial
Andross: What?
Jigglypuff: Lord, have mercy on the sinner's soul.....
Fox: He doesn't deserve it...
Jigglypuff:........ the reason I summoned you all here was perhaps to end this senseless bloodshed between the two sides of Lylat.... I guess that's just not going to happen.
Buck: Why can't we all just, get along?
Leon:  BECAUSE YOU ARE AN ANNOYING BIRD!
Jigglypuff: The sick thing is, you killed someone on your own side.. heck, he's related to you..
Andross: Well, if that's supposed to make some sort of a difference, you have
me all wrong....
Jigglypuff: ...........  YOU SICK, TWISTED, DEMON!
Fox: I thought you wished mercy for him...
Andrew opens his mouth
Andrew:.... uncle... :cough: uncle Andross... r-r-read me another Curious George book..
Jigglypuff: Andrew.. you're alive!! By the grace of god you are alive!
Andrew stands up and does a back flip

Andrew: Nah, I was just playing, I’m fine!
Everyone: WHAT?!
Andrew: That's right, I did it as a joke!
Wolf: You slime ball...
Leon: You low, dirty..
Pigma: I want some cupcakes!!
Andross: Andrew, you dirt bag! Playing dead for attention is so low.. so low even I wouldn't do that!!! YOUR PUNISHED! IM NOT READING YOU CURIOUS GEORGE FLIES A KITE TONIGHT!
Andrew: Aw....
Jigglypuff turns red

Jigglypuff: *turns red* YOU - YOU- YOU SON OF A BUILDING BLOCK!!
Everyone: Huh?
Wolf: What the heck?
Jigglypuff: I say really stupid things when I get REALLY upset...Why did you do that? You almost ruined my life, my interview, my-
Andross: Whoa, whoa, whoa, timeout.. how would that ruin your life?
Jigglypuff: It would haunt me... and I would have to move to a different house in Kanto.. I couldn't bear to live here with the vision that someone died on the floor... Andrew, why would you joke about something that serious?
Andrew: I'll tell you why! Because I’m fed up! My whole team hates me, you hate me, and Uncle Andross hates me.
Jigglypuff: That's not true, I don't hate you..
Slippy: Yeah Andrew, neither do I!
Everyone looks at Slippy, and blinks
Andross: Jigglypuff, I would never kill my nephew, he may drive me crazy, and sometimes.. well actually almost all the time I may want to kill him, but I never would.
Jigglypuff: Then why did you not care when he appeared to be dead?
Andross bends down to Whisper to Jigglypuff

Andross: I couldn't act like I had feelings in front of everyone..
Jigglypuff: Oh.. I see. If that's true, than I apologize, I’m sorry for what I said about you.
Andrew: OWWW!! OH GOD, SOMETHING’S WRONG!

Andross grabs his back
Leon: Yeah, I’m sure Andrew.
Wolf: Andrew, have you ever read the Aesop "The boy who called Wolf?"
Andrew Screams
Fox: Ugh! He screams higher than Slippy!
Andross: HE SCREAMS LIKE A GIRL!
Slippy: Cool!!
Jigglypuff: Hey! So what if he does! There's nothing wrong with girls!
Slippy: Yeah! Yeah!
Jigglypuff turns to Andrew

Jigglypuff: Andrew, if it's attention you are seeking, this is NOT the way to get it....
Andrew: Help..

He falls down
Fox: You know, Im starting to get really sick of this, I came here for a tour of Kanto, and your damn nephew has cost us what, 2 hours?! Can't you keep the little fur ball under control Andross? Or is that too much for you to handle?
Andross: SHUT UP FOX!!!!
Jigglypuff looks closely at Andrew

Jigglypuff: Hey... wait a second, his back.. there's all these markings on him.. you guys, I don't think he's faking it.. oh!!! THESE ARE ZUBAT BITES!
Andross: Really? He claimed that one was on my back on the way here..
Jigglypuff: He was probably telling the truth...
Wolf: Well, now we are going to have to pamper the baby until he gets well!
Jigglypuff: So that's why he was bleeding.. this is serious, we have to get him to the Pokémon Centre
Everyone starts laughing at her
Jigglypuff: What? I’m serious!
Andross: Andrew! I chose you! Use your bitch attack!
Everyone laughs harder
Jigglypuff: Look, he can seriously die if we don't get him some help..  since we are short on time, why don't you guys tour Kanto to your hearts content, and meet up with me at the Viridian Forest? Careful though, some trainer might mistake you for being Pokémon..
Pigma: That sounds like fun! I'll get to eat rare candies!
Wolf: Pigma will be the new heaviest Pokémon, Snorlax, eat your heart out!
Pigma: HEY!!!!
Jigglypuff: How do you guys know all this stuff?
Fox: Um... well.. we play Pokémon back in Lylat.
Jigglypuff falls down anime style
Slippy: Don't I look like a Politoed?!
Jigglypuff: Now that you mentioned it..... AHHH!
Andross: Jigglypuff, why don't you just bring him to the Pokémon Centre yourself.. I have a few important matters to take care of.. (I must find a worthy Pokémon to carry out my plan to raid Corneria..
Jigglypuff: OH NO, I AM NOT going to baby-sit your nephew, you are his legal guardian, and you are responsible for him.
Andross: Under the Cornerian laws..
Jigglypuff: Cornerian, Venomian, WHO CARES! SAME THING!
Andross: Actually....
Jigglypuff: JUST HELP ME HAUL HIS SORRY ASS TO THE POKÉMON CENTRE, OKAY!? IF
YOU DO, I'LL LET YOU KEEP A POKÉMON FOR YOURSELF.. that is, if you can capture it..
Andross: All right, deal.
Jigglypuff: Good..... now we will all meet at the north side of Viridian Forest. I’m sorry I can't be your tour guide like I promised, but I need to get Andrew help.
Andross: No you don't...
Jigglypuff: Come on.. let's go.. follow me..
Andross DRAGS Andrew to the Pokémon Centre with Jigglypuff
-----
At the Pokémon Centre..
----

Nurse Joy: Welcome to our Pokémon Centre, we heal your Pokémon back to perfect health.. shall we heal your Pokémon?
Jigglypuff: Ms. Monotone.. always says the same thing over and over.. a-hem, yes!!
Nurse Joy: All right, we'll need your Pokémon
Andross carelessly drops Andrew on the counter
Andross: How long is this going to take, anyhow?
Nurse Joy: Just a few seconds-
Nurse: You're Pokémon are back to health, we hope to see you again!

The nurse hand Andross a Pokéball
Andross: Trust me lady, you WON'T...
Jigglypuff: Alright, let's get out of here..
-----
Outside The Pokémon Center......

----
Andross: You are telling me, Andrew is inside this.. this... what's it called again?
Jigglypuff: Pokéball... throw it to let him out..
Andross: Hell no, the only throwing I'll do with it is throwing it off a cliff or into a bottomless pit!
Jigglypuff: That's not very nice Andross...
Andross: Oh, I’m sorry; Did I give you the impression that I am NICE?
Jigglypuff: Aside from the times you tried to butter it up with me to use my voice.. NO.
Andross: That's right.
----
Starwolf, Andross and Jigglypuff soon meet up with the Starfox Team in Viridian Forest

----
Jigglypuff: So, how are you guys enjoying the world of Pokémon?
 Fox: We're having a blast! We've spotted many kinds of Pokémon!
Slippy: Yeah! Yeah!
Buck: Gotta Catch Em' all!
Peppy: Pokémon!!
Suddenly the Pokéball in Andross's hand shakes, then Andrew comes out
Andross: I thought you said he can only come out if I throw this?
Jigglypuff: Well take it into consideration that he isn't a Pokémon...
Andross: Too bad he isn't..
Ash: Pokémon? Pokémon!? You must be a Pokémon trainer! I’m Ash Ketchum from the town of Pallet, and I’m going to be the worlds best Pokémon trainer!
Andross: I’m Emperor Andross, from the planet Venom, and I don't give a rat's ass about you!

He turns away and continues walking. Ash follows Andross

Ash:*Follows Andross*  Grrr. I don't like your attitude, right Pikachu?
Pikachu: PIKA PI!
Andross: Now, why would I care what some brat thinks about me who has a filthy rat on there shoulder?
Jigglypuff: Hahahahahaha!!
Ash: That does it! I challenge you to a Pokémon battle!
Andross turns around

Andross: What?
Ash: You heard me! A Pokémon battle!
Andross: (Smirks) Only I have the brains to be a Pokémon master!
Jigglypuff: Andross... no offence, but you are really making a monkey out of- eh, a fool out of yourself..
Ash: We'll just see about that, Andross! Pikachu! I choose you!!
Pikachu: Pika! Pikachu!!!
He walks in front of Ash
Andross: What did it say, Jigglypuff?
Jigglypuff: "All right, time to show the monkey's whose boss!"
Buck: HEY!

He glares at Pikachu
Andross: Ah, whatever, I'll dispose of this one..
Jigglypuff: What are you talking about? You don't have a Pokémon....
Andross looks at Jigglypuff
Jigglypuff: Oh no, I’m not fighting any battles now.. I ONLY DO MELEE FIGHTS!
Andross: Fine.. I have backup..

He looks at Andrew
Andrew: uh.... erm...
Ash: Bring it on Andross!
Pikachu: PIKA!
Andross: All right..

He grabs Andrew

Andross: I choose you go Andrew!!

Andross throws Andrew into the battlefield
 Jigglypuff: You are using Andrew? GAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! ANDROSS! YOU CRACK ME UP!!
Wolf: I can't believe Andross is actually going to do this..
Leon: This is going to be interesting..
Ash: Looks at Andrew Wow, what's that? It must be a rare Pokémon, Pikachu, be careful!
Pikachu: Chuu!!
Ash: all right Pikachu, lets start off the battle with a growl attack!
Pikachu: Pika piiiii!! *Growls at Andrew*
Andrew: Uncle Andross! The Pikachu is being a meanie!
Andross: Andrew, use your whine attack!
Jigglypuff: Whine attack?
Andrew starts whining

Andrew: UNCLE ANDROSS! IM NOT A POKÉMON! AND I DON'T WANT TO USE MY WHINE ATTACK! IM HUNGRY! UNCLE ANDROSS ARE YOU LISTENING TO ME?  I NEED NEW PANTS, THESE ARE TOO TIGHT ON ME! IM TIRED! WAAAAAAA!
Pikachu: PIKAAAAAAA!
Ash: OH NO! PIKACHU!
Jigglypuff: Heheheheheh, it's super effective..
Pikachu falls over
Andross: Mwahahahaha! A one-hit-KO!
Jigglypuff claps for Andrew and Andross

Ash: Pikachu, return!!

Ash recalls Pikachu inside the Pokéball. He looks up at Andross.

Ash: You're good, but I’m better!
Wolf: Shut the hell up, Ash!
Ash: I’m just getting warmed up..

He grabs a different Pokéball and throws it
Ash: SCIZOR! I CHOOSE YOU!
Scizor: Sciiiiizor!

It goes into a fighting stance, with its steel claws pointed forward, aiming at Andrew
Andross: Ha! That Tin Can is no match for me!
Ash: Oh yeah? Scizor! Use you're metal claw!
Jigglypuff: Oh boy.. this isn't going to end pretty..
Scizor sprints at Andrew, and before he has a chance to react, Scizor smacks him across the face using metal claw
Andrew: UNCLE ANDROSS!!! HELP ME!!!
Jigglypuff: Sorry, but only the Pokémon are allowed to fight.. :giggles:
Andross: Uh.... Use your swagger move!
Andrew struts over to Scizor

Andrew: Give it up! you can't win!!
Scizor: Scizor!?
Ash: It's confused!
Seizor hurts itself in it's confusion
Ash: Dang it... return Seizor!
Jigglypuff: A Seizor losing to Andrew? That’s just sad.
Andross: This kid's a pushover!
Ash grabs another Pokéball from his belt

Ash: Don't listen to him, you can do it.. GO !
he Pokéball pops open, revealing a pokémon

Pokémon: Karp! Karp!

Jigglypuff laughs

Jigglypuff: Oh boy, you better watch out.. here comes a Magikarp !
Andross: HA! VICTORY IS MINE! ANDREW, GO GET YOUR DINNER! USE YOUR BITE ATTACK! (To Ash) YOUR WILL DIE, JUST LIKE YOUR PIKACHU!
Jigglypuff: Oh brother..
Andrew: Uncle Andross.. I don't like fish..
Andross: Damnit Andrew, just kill the damn thing!!
Ash: Your Pokémon isn't obeying you.. some trainer you are! ! Magikarp, Use your splash attack!
Magikarp: Karp.. Magii.. KARP!

It uses splash, sprinkling water on Andrew. Andrew Slips on the water and falls down on his head

Andrew: AHH! OWWW! (Starts crying) IT... HURTS... UNCLE ANDROSS!
Jigglypuff: Oh my gosh, Andrew losing to a Magikarp's splash?! Now I've seen everything..
Ash: Yeah! We did it ! We beat it!
Andross: YOU GOT TO BE KIDDING! ANDREW, QUIT LOAFING AROUND AND GET UP!
Andrew: WAAA!!
Jigglypuff: This is a disgrace.. come on Andrew, you can't possibly be in that much pain, get up!
Andrew: *Still crying* I... I can't.. I think I broke my spine.. Im fully paralyzed!
Jigglypuff: That's just plain pathetic..
Andross: NO! I LOST TO A MERE FISH?!
Ash: Ha! So, you out of Pokémon? Then I win!!! We did it Pikachu!
Pikachu: Pika-pikachu!
Andross: WAIT! I’m not finished yet!
Jigglypuff: Sorry Andross, but when you are out of Pokémon, it's game over for you..
Andross looks at Jigglypuff
Jigglypuff: Hey, what are you looking at? I... uh oh.. DON'T EVEN-
Andross: Jigglypuff, I choose you!!
Jigglypuff: I don't recommend it Andross..
Andross: What are you talking about, you’re a Pokémon right?
Jigglypuff: Of course, but you see, I’m not your every day average one.. I do Melee fights.. not Pokémon battles.
Andross: You must! I’m not going to lose to that moron Ash Caiman!
Ash: THAT'S KETCHUM!
Caiman: :sigh:
Jigglypuff: Fine... I’m warning you.. I’m a little rusty..
Andross: Are you kidding? You weren't rusty when you destroyed my empire..
Jigglypuff: Ok, ok, you got me.

She turns around

Jigglypuff: It's only a Magikarp anyway.. I.. huh?

Everyone looks at the Magikarp, which is glowing a vibrate gold

Jigglypuff: Oh that's just peachy.. It's-
Ash: -Evolving!! All right!
Andross: ?
The Magikarp evolves into the mighty Gyarados, a dragon like monster over 20 ft in length. With a mighty roar, it bares it's fangs at Jigglypuff
Andross: WHAT THE HELL? IMPOSSIBLE! HOW COULD THAT INSIGNIFICANT AQUATIC PET MATERIAL TRANSFORM INTO THIS BEAST!? There's no way Jigglypuff can win!
Leon snickers

Leon: Ah, what a shame, it looks like you wont be a Pokémon master after all.. hahahaahaha!
Andross glares at Leon
Jigglypuff: Hey wait a second!! You think I can't win, Andross? Thanks for your support!
Andross: You be positive; I'll be realistic.
Jigglypuff gives Andross a dirty look

Jigglypuff: You want me to fight or not?
Andross: All right..
Ash: Gyrados, let's end this now! Use Hyper Beam!
Jigglypuff: Oh crap...
Gyarados opens it's mouth, gathering energy for it's most powerful attack, and unleashes a beam of brutal force at Jigglypuff
Andross: Jigglypuff! GET OUT OF THERE!
Jigglypuff: No.. I fight all the way!
Ash: Ha! It's a suicide-puff!
Jigglypuff gets hit head- on with the hyper beam,  goes flying, and lands on her face in front of Andross
Ash: Yeah we got it!
Andross: Damn it!

He squats down to Jigglypuff
Andross: I’m sorry Jigglypuff.. are you ok?
Jigglypuff: Am I ok... well let's see.. I JUST GOT NAILED WITH A HYPER BEAM, AND YOU ARE ASKING ME IF IM OK!?

She jumps up

Jigglypuff: Hee hee hee, Of course I am!! Good thing I have a lot of hit points!
Andross: Whew!
Ash: WHAT!?
Jigglypuff: Hey Gyrados, it's time for you to get a taste of your own medicine.. TWICE AS HARD..

She jumps in the air, and the energy she absorbed from the hyper beam shoots out of her body, smashing the Gyarados into the ground with one simple shot
Ash: OH NO! IT USED COUNTER!
Jigglypuff: That I did; Too bad for you, eh?
The Garyados doesn't get up
Andross: Holy crap! That was some move!
Jigglypuff: Well, you know me, there is "no way I can win.."
Andross: I’m sorry..
Jigglypuff: It's ok, I’m just giving you a hard time..
Ash: Gyrados, return.. well Pikachu, we only have one Pokémon left..
Suddenly a blue ghost Pokémon walks beside Jigglypuff
Wobbefett: WOBBA!!
Jigglypuff: Well what do you know, it's my friend Wobbefett, how are you doing?
Wobbafett: Wobba! (I’m doing great, I saw you fight the Gyrados, that was awesome! It makes me want to fight, too! Do you think the monkey Andross will let me fight Ash's last Pokémon?)
Jigglypuff: Hmm

She pokes Andross's leg

Jigglypuff: Hey, Wobbefett wants to fight..
Andross: Ha, why should I use that weakling when I have you!?
Jigglypuff: HEY! WOBBEFETT ISN'T A WEAKLING! Um... YEAH!
Ash: I'll show you! Go Rhydon!
Jigglypuff: Look, Wobbefett is my friend, and wants to help you, give him a go, ok?
Andross: Fine..

He looks at Wobbefett

Andross: What the hell is wrong with this Pokémon? It looks like it's constipated!
Wobbafett: Wobbbbba!
Jigglypuff: That's not a very nice thing to say Andross..
Ash: Hey! Let's get the battle going!
Andross: All right.. shesh the kid reminds me of Andrew..Go Wobbefett..
Wobbafett slowly walks in the battlefield
Andross: Ok, use your.. uh... WHAT THE (censored)!? It doesn’t know any attacking moves... Jigglypuff.. you tricked me!!
Jigglypuff: No I didn't; Wobbefett is a great Pokémon, in fact, it taught me how to use counter!
Andross: Oh that's right..
Ash: WE WON'T LET YOUR WOBBEFETT HAVE THE CHANCE TO FIGHT BACK, RHYDON, TAKE IT DOWN IN ONE SHOT...
Buck: Go find your own quotes, Ash
Ash: USE HORN DRILL!
Rhydon charges at the Wobbefett, thrusting its horn
Andross: IF I GO DOWN IM TAKING YOU WITH ME! Wobbefett, use destiny bond!
Wobbefett uses destiny bond

Wobbefett: Wobba!!
Ash: OH NO! RHYDON, DON'T ATTACK IT-SHOOT!!!!
Rhydon hits Wobbefett with horndrill, knocking it down, but a mysterious force also took out Rhydon
Jigglypuff: Hey you did it Wobbefett! You KOed Ash's last Pokémon.. uh, but you got KOed yourself..
Wobbafett: Wobba Wobba! (That's ok, it's all good!)
Ash: Oh no! I’m out of Pokémon!
Andross: I WON! I DOMINATE ALL! YOU KNOW THAT I CONTROL THE POKÉMON! I'LL MAKE THOSE TRAINERS PAY!
Jigglypuff: Ok Andross, enough with the Starfox quotes..
Andross: .......I’m a Pokémon master, Jigglypuff! Do you hear me? A POKÉMON MASTER!!
Andrew: Bow before the great Pokémon Master..
Jigglypuff: Too bad your mouth isn't paralyzed..
Ash runs home crying over his defeat
Andross: Now.. to conquer the world of Pokémon!
Jigglypuff: Uh-huh.. well, I’m sorry Andross but it's time for you to be heading home.. I hope you enjoyed your visit to Kanto.
Andross: (Damn! I still didn't catch a Pokémon to help me take over the Lylat System.. I can still try to con this Jigglypuff though..)
Andross:  Yes... I had a good time... so...... it ends here..
Jigglypuff: Yes, I will now use my psychic move to transport you back to Venom..
Andross: What? No souvenir?
Jigglypuff: A souvenir? You want a souvenir?
Andross: How about this nice Wobbefett?
Jigglypuff: No...
Andross: A Dragonite?
Jigglypuff: NO.
Andross: Mabye a Ho-oh?
Jigglypuff: Yeah, like you could get your hands on one of those things..
Andrew: Uncle Andross! Take me to the Pokémon Centre! I’m hurt!
Andross: SHUT UP, CAN'T YOU TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF FOR ONCE IN YOUR LIFE?
Andrew:... no..
Jigglypuff: Goodnight Andross, don't be disappointed, I'll send you a postcard from Mt. Moon.. I will now teleport you all back..
Andross: NO.. WAIT-
Jigglypuff, in a flash of light, sends the Starfox, and Starwolf Team as well as Andross back home
----
At Mt Moon in Jigglypuff's house
----
Jigglypuff: Wow, that was a very crazy interview... heh, I thought I would never get rid of them.. let's see... who should I interview next? How about.. Bill Grey? Let's see... he lives on Katina.. I think I know where that is! Well, I need to get my rest, I hope to see you soon, bye!

TO BE CONTINUED (As always)

Author's note to the reader: I hope you enjoyed this special interview, but in general, I try to keep my interviews short,  I don't know if you like this better than the others.. so depending on the feedback, I may or may not have another crossover interview.. I was thinking of doing one with Star Wars.. ;)